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15 September 2010 @ 04:47 pm
Thoughts on TVD 2x01 Katherine/Damon/Elena scenes  

Hello friends! :D 
I've been working on sorting out my thoughts about Damon/Elena in 2x01, and here is my little, humble contribution. Tell me what you think.

Since watching the fantastic premiere f the second season of The Vampire Diaries (TVD), I’ve been mesmerized by the beauty of how the storylines were weaved together, and especially the Stefan/Katherine and Damon/Elena scenes. However,I’ve heard my fair share of anti-Damon/Elena talk about the premiere and especially the last scene in Elena’s bedroom. I’ll just quote some of the statements that seemed the most provoking to me and answer them.

“Damon came to Elena’s room for the wrong reasons – after Katherine broke his heart.”

What does this exactly mean?! Does it mean that Damon came to see Elena and try things with her to replace Katherine?! Havent we who actually managed to SEE and HEAR what happens on this show already agreed on that Damon never saw Elena as a replacement to Katherine?! Damon is not a stupid man; he knew immediately that Elena was the polar opposite of Katherine, and it has been exactly those qualities in her than made Damon fall in love with her on the course of the whole first season. Her compassion for him, her empathy, the way she believed in the good inside of him, the way she thought he was worth saving.

Secondly, he came to Elena’s room because apparently, Stefan and Damon have agreed on taking shifts to watch over the Gilbert house day and night to protect them from Katherine. Since Stefan spends the whole day with Elena, he needs to rest at night, and Damon comes to watch over the Gilberts at night.
“I’m just doing my part of the neighbourhood watch.” – Damon
“Thank you for looking out for us. For me.” – Elena.
So it is obvious by now that Damon didn’t come to her room at random just to try and make out with her because he was rejected by Katherine.

Thirdly, IF anyone was anyone’s replacemnt in episode 2x01, I’d say Katherine was Damon’s replacement for Elena and not the other way around.
Since the start of the episode, Damon has been upset with the fact that it wasn’t Elena he kissed, and THEN after Katherine seeking HIM out in his house, and not the other way around, he made out with her; partly because he hasn’t seen her for such a long time and because he has REALLY loved for all those years and a reunion with her would naturally lead to some kind of release of passion, but also PARTLY because he wanted to forget about Elena and her rejection of him. The Damon/Katherine make-out scene happened after Elena told Damon “I’m surprised you thought I’d kiss you back” – a comment that really hurt him. So Katherine being there asking him to kiss her, she was like “the Elena who WOULD actually kiss him back” in a way. Like I said, partly this and partly that ;)
But it becomes even more obvious in the scene between Damon and Elena at the Lockwood’s mansion where Damon said: “You’re scared. You’re worried Katherine will send me off the deep end. I don’t need HER for that.” That line alone makes it clear to me that even though Katherine’s words cut him deeply and hurt him badly, the only one who is capable of breaking Damon down completely was Elena, and that is exactly what happened in that bedroom scene. She rejected him, again, and that broke him and made him snap.

“Damon assaulted Elena sexually by forcing kisses on her”

This one had me laughing at first, but then I realised that some people either have a twisted definition of sexual assault, OR they have a special super-strict measure for anything related to Damon/Elena. If I was a woman who has suffered a sexual assault I would be damn insulted if anyone compared THAT traumatic experience with what happened between Damon and Elena in that scene. From what I saw, what happened was light-years away from assault. Damon’s kiss was a desperate attempt at making Elena understand what he’s saying, to prove something to her. What happened was a one-sided kiss from Damon and not a case of using violence to get a kiss or anything else sexual. When Elena pulled away from him, telling him to stop and listen, he DID stop and listened to her! Anyone who would try to assault a woman and force himself on her would not give a damn about what she had to say, he wouldn’t have stopped if that was his goal. Let alone, he took her hand and clasped it in his and he got a little hopeful smile on his face when she said “I care about you”. It was an emotional moment for him, not a moment where he was trying to get sex from her. It’s true that he kissed her against her wish, but he didn’t try to force her into anything by actually being violent or using force on her. He kissed her once, and tried another kiss later, until she stopped him and took his hands in hers, and he STOPPED again!
Damon is a vampire on human blood and he could have pinned Elena to that wall and taken whatever he wanted from her. IF he wanted that.
This is like a guy who tries to make out with his girl friend and she goes “NO!” and he tries again “Oh come on!” and she goes “NO!” again, and he STOPS right there. Did this guy assault his girlfriend?! No, I didn’t think so either.

Talking about violence and assault in TVD, why do I not hear anyone calling what Stefan did to Elena in 1x19 (Miss Mystic Falls) a violent assault? Stefan actually SLAMMED Elena in to a wall, screamed at her and punched the wall RIGHT beside her face to scare her. I’ve never called this scene an assault even though I could have, easily. I understand that even though it’s not okay to slam your girlfriend in to a wall, Stefan was ADDICTED to human blood, which to him is like a human addicted to drugs. People on drugs do crazy things they don’t want to do, and that’s what happened with Stefan there. The question is now why Damon/Elena fans can see these things, understand other characters and excuse some of their questionable actions while opposing fanbases cant do the same regarding Damon/Elena? God knows we’re no angels in the Damon/Elena camp, but I actually think that we understand other fans more than they even try to understand our point of view. So next time, please try and look at the situation without your anti-Damon/Elena glasses on and try again ☺

“Damon would have raped Elena if Jeremy didn’t come in to the room”.

What could Jeremy have done to stop Damon from doing whatever he wanted to do? Jeremy doesn’t stand a chance against Damon as a human and he wouldn’t have stood a chance against him as a vampire. Damon was obviously not interested in sex, rape or assault, because if he was, you KNOW that he would have done it no matter what or who walked in on him.

What the writers were trying to tell us with that scene is, that Damon is desperate for Elena to admit that there is something going on between them, even if that meant forcing a kiss on her, because he thought that the first time he kissed “Elena”, it turned out to be Katherine so that’s why she kissed him back, and if he tried to kiss the REAL Elena, maybe she WILL kiss him back if given the chance, and THAT was his true goal from the attempts at kissing her. He was hoping that she would not be able to resist kissing him once he had his lips on hers because of the feelings he is convinced she has for him, and that’s why he tried so hard.

It seems to me that with thee powerful scenes the writers are trying to tell us all that Damon/Elena are not just an obstacle for Stefan/Elena to overcome, to make them stronger, no. Damon/Elena DO have at least just as much meaning as Stefan/Elena, and that they definitely are a huge part of the show, while some of the fans who are anti-D/E are just trying to spin what we’re told and shown on the show around to make Damon/Elena look like nothing deep or meaningful, like nothing serious, as if they’re not really going to have a real love story.
And with that attitude towards the show and the pairing that is actually half the triangle the show is based upon, you will just stress and upset yourself by watching the show and making a HUGE part of the TVD fandom upset and annoyed with your blind Damon/Elena hate.

Now to my dear Damon/Elena fans:

I know that a lot of you feel broken hearted about those really heartbreaking scenes in the premiere, but believe me that these scenes and this start of the season is the BEST thing that could ever have happened to Damon/Elena and their relationship. Besides that I see a lot of Elena-hate around, not only from anti-Damon/Elena fans but also from Delena shippers, and that is NOT right! We love them both, or else we have no right to ship them together. Elena is a fantastic girl and that is why Damon fell in love with her. Her hurting him in this episode doesn’t make her a bad person, because we have to try and see things from her perspective too. I always put myself in Damon’s shoes and then in Elena’s shoes. It doesn’t work any other way, friends. We need to understand them BOTH and love them BOTH. ☺

First of all; Damon has finally revealed to Elena that he feels for her more than friendship, and she shot him down by being honest with him, telling him that she wouldn’t kiss him back and cheat on Stefan. What broke Damon was that he really is in love with Elena and when she said “I’m surprised you thought I would kiss you back”, she meant that she’s surprised he thought that she would ever cheat on her boyfriend, but he took it personally, he thought she was saying that she wouldn’t ever kiss HIM because she wouldn’t ever have feelings for HIM. And it wasn’t what she meant.

Secondly, When Elena told him “It will always be Stefan” in her bedroom she told him what she thinks at that moment. We all know that no one knows what the future can bring, and neither does Elena. She just told hi the harsh truth, to make him listen to her, to get through to him, and make him stop trying to kiss her, when she wants to tell him something. And I don’t blame her for telling him the truth simply because it is her right to be in love with who she is in love with at the moment. She cant control her emotions and feelings and her love for Stefan right now, like she wont be able to control her feelings and love for Damon LATER on. She’s still a human being with feelings, emotions and a heart she cant always control, and we need to understand that even though we know and are convinced that she belongs with Damon and no one else. ☺
Now to the hardest part of it all: Damon killed Jeremy!

No matter if Damon knew Jeremy was wearing that ring that brings him back to life or if he thought Jeremy would turn in to a vampire, it is NOT OKAY for him to kill Jeremy! BUT I don understand how and WHY he did it at the same time. I will never try to excuse Damon for killing Jeremy or anyone else innocent, but understand Damon’s character and how he reacts to emotional blows like the ones he got in the premiere makes me understand why he snapped Jeremy’s neck. First of all, Katherine told him she has never ever loved him, making his mere existence pointless, because he has only lived for her, for the hope of finding her and living forever with her and nothing else has been on his mind. And then we have Elena, who is the girl he’s falling in love with right now, who tells him that she can never love him, because she doesn’t know any better. And knowing Damon, if there is anything that can break him completely it is being rejected from the one he loves, especially if that rejection involved choosing Stefan over him. That is what he has experienced his whole life, and it HURTS! His father, Katherine and now Elena love Stefan more than him. It really really hurts, and with Damon being a very emotional vampire who acts on his emotions, he will of course act on it. And the only defence mechanism he has to deflect hurt away from himself is death, destruction, blood and sarcasm. So with that in mind it is to be expected of him to do something terrible at that exact moment where he was not thinking at ALL. With him killing Jeremy he was trying to switch off that humanity switch that he has inside him to just stop hurting. It obviously didn’t work, so when he went home he wasn’t less upset or numb, he was still hurting and he couldn’t believe that he had done what he just has done; i.e throwing the glass in to the fire, being angry and upset with everything and with himself.

Now to Elena, like I said before, she wasn’t trying to hurt his feelings, but only trying to tell him the truth in stead of leading him on and playing him like Katherine did. Isnt this why we all love Elena so much? Because she wouldn’t never play Damon and hurt him like Katherine did. But when he snapped her brother’s neck in front of her eyes, and she did NOT know that he was wearing that ring, was the WORST thing he could ever do to her. Worse than killing her. To experience that horror, that FEAR when you see your brother lying there on the floor lifeless and limp, how can you NOT hate the person who did this to him? Of course she hates him – for now . If you notice, the writers made a big deal of Katherine telling Stefan that “hate is the beginning of a love story, not the end of it” – and then making Elena use the SAME word: HATE. This is a BLATANT, OBVIOUS move from the writers to tell us all that: Damon/Elena are OFFICIALLY beginning now. Now they will SLOWLY, and REALISTICALLY, rebuild their friendship and their relationship, they will get the time to get over the heartbreak, all those negative feelings, and we are getting an AMAZING build-up, because remember; ALL fan-favourite EPIC AMAZING COUPLES have had a big amount of heartbreak and angst before they got together and people died of happiness. Believe me what happened is amazing for DE! The great and bigger the heartbreak, the sweeter and more amazing the reunion will be. ☺
And I am a member of the Damon/Elena thread on Fanforum, and I swear to you that we got 21 new Delena shippers ONLY after the premiere and because of those angsty heartbreaking scenes! That’s amazing! :D

Now, heads up, smile, and keep the faith and all the hope! Damon and Elena deserve it from us, to keep holding on to them. And you will see that I’m right when the time for Damon/Elena is right. The writers will not disappoint over 60% of the fandom! They wont, and they know what they are doing. They are making this triangle REAL, making Elena fall DEEPLY in love with BOTH guys, to make it a REAL triangle, and a REALLY fantastic love story – especially for Delena because their story has been deeper than anyone else.

I hope that helped ☺
Kisara: TVD || Damon dancin'kisara_ryoma on September 15th, 2010 03:28 pm (UTC)
Awesome collection of your thoughts about the TVD premier and I support everything you've written. I can understand why so many DE fans are upset about the first episode. What I can't understand is why they're making such a big fuss about it. We always knew that Damon is a very unstable person. As you already pointed out he was rejected by everyone he loved and still does - I mean come on... he still loves Elena and Katherine and Stefan in his own fucked up way XD - ... oh and his own brother betrayed him.

I'm really looking forward to the upcomming episodes and I wonder how Kev and Julie are going to keep the love traingle alive. For the season 2 finale I want to see Damon choose Elena over Katherine and staking the latter one *ggg* with a smile on his lips while saying "goodbye bitch"
so I stayed in the darkness with you: hbicnodawnnoday on September 15th, 2010 03:46 pm (UTC)
damon killing katherine, yes. it is the ultimate scrifice for him, and i think it would really show elena how much he cares.
MissDKmissdk on September 17th, 2010 06:03 pm (UTC)
AGREED honey! :D
Thanks for commenting ;)
so I stayed in the darkness with you: hbicnodawnnoday on September 15th, 2010 03:43 pm (UTC)

Damon raping her?


I didn't even know that was being said. I mean really. Plus, he had stopped kissing, when they were all holding hands, and you can see him give up, and like drop her hands?(continuity error bc he's holding them still in the next shot?)/shrug is shoulders, right befor jer came in.

These are like my exact thoughts. I really think they are making this love triangle into a real legit love triangle. Which will be so far beyond epic. Slow build-up ftw. Chuck/Blair anyone... took til the season 2 finale. granted the show did kinda fail after that, but i think it was partly because chuck/blair had overcome all their obsticals so they started throwing shit out there, but i don't think DE will ever not have obsticals.

This season will be epic, cannot wait for tomorrow. Elena saving damon the bitchy bonnie? yes, please.
MissDKmissdk on September 17th, 2010 06:05 pm (UTC)
Exactly. Haters are always gonna hate, but I will not be silenced by their absurd stupidity. Tey need someone to kick their ass every now and again for sure! :P

And YES for epicness. Since I started shipping them I just KNEW they would be amazing, and it's all starting now. It's fantastic <3

Bitchy Bonnie to be killed by Katherine?! Yes, please, haha :D
so I stayed in the darkness with younodawnnoday on September 18th, 2010 06:03 am (UTC)
i know i so cannot wait, wheever it happens epic epicness will ensue.

and yeah kat killing bonnie would be great! but i don't want a bonnie pity party so she can just hang around and be ated i guess.
MissDKmissdk on September 18th, 2010 08:29 am (UTC)
Yeah you're right. Everyone will worship Bonnie even more than they do now. I hope the fans begin hating her VERY MUCH this season. I have a strong feeling that Bonnie will side with the werewolves AGAINST the Salvatores and I'm sure Caroline will be on the vampire side, and so will Elena. Ooh, Bonnie-hate? I WANT xD
so I stayed in the darkness with younodawnnoday on September 18th, 2010 08:36 am (UTC)
ugh, me too. i think pretty much everyone at leaste dislikes her, except for at leat bamon shippers. and good point i do wonder where all the loyalties will lie once two sides are revealed. like can bonnie really go against caroline/ where does katherine fit in? and alaric with his damon bromance, and jer with his blooming damon and tyler bromances.
MissDKmissdk on September 18th, 2010 08:40 am (UTC)
Oh yeah! Alaric will definitely side with Damon if it came down to it. He sees something human in Damon as he said in 1x21. I think, given Bonnie's reaction to Caroline being a vampire, she can very well go against her. The writers said that this season will have some unlikely friendships and alliances.

Jeremy... ooh.. That's a little tough, but I THINK he will side with Damon, because Kevin Williamson and Steven R. McQueen said in Comic Con that Damon will be a father-like figure for Jeremy :)
so I stayed in the darkness with you: SC2nodawnnoday on September 18th, 2010 08:44 am (UTC)
Ah yay, I want for Damon/Jeremy, I don't want him to go on a vampire hatefest lik bonnie.

and then there is rumor of a like tyler/bonnie romance... uhm no thank you.
MissDKmissdk on September 18th, 2010 08:48 am (UTC)
lol, if it keeps Bonnie away from Damon, then okay :P

Nah, I like Tyler/Caroline actually. They could make one fierce bitchy couple
so I stayed in the darkness with you: SCnodawnnoday on September 18th, 2010 08:55 am (UTC)
ahh i was going to say that, but i fee llike no one ships them. i have basically always liked them from the beggining, they are so similar, would be a feirce bitchy couple.

and yeah D/B never gunna happen, i mean mybe they would just like randomly hook up during some random season. but i don't think the write ar going for anything substantial with them.
MissDKmissdk on September 18th, 2010 09:36 am (UTC)
lol, no Tyler/Caroline would be awesome. And now she's a vamp, it would be SOOOO awesome if she hit it off with a werewolf, lol.

Although, Stefan/Caroline scenes were really nice in 2x02. But I dont like Stefan enough to ship him with ANYONE.
so I stayed in the darkness with younodawnnoday on September 18th, 2010 09:39 am (UTC)
vamp/werewolf relation ship,yes please.

haha i don't hate stefan, and i don't know why exactly. but i want SC but i don't see the writers taking it there.
jennx0 on September 15th, 2010 08:35 pm (UTC)
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH ASDFGH. i love when people spend the time to put their thoughts down :) This was awesome :DD
MissDKmissdk on September 17th, 2010 10:36 am (UTC)
Thank you SO much! :D

It's my pleasure to sit down and put my thoughts on TVD and Damon/Elena down on paper and post it for the rest of the fandom to enjoy, and it makes me so happy to bring some joy to the Damon/Elena fanbase, always :D

lillypauline: delillypauline on September 17th, 2010 05:24 pm (UTC)
Wow I'm so happy about this post lala! You know I was looking forward to reading it! It really was amazing! I think you had a good answer to the stupid typical things haters said after the premiere. I've awlays been very optimistic for them, I know it's teh best that could happen and hat they'll be even stronger and deeper after what happened in the premiere! I loved how you summed that up! Thank you for a beautiful post <3
MissDKmissdk on September 17th, 2010 06:03 pm (UTC)
Aww thank you! :D Your comment is amazing, so thanks hun <3

I am glad you liked it after me promising to write it for a couple of days and all, hehe :D

(Deleted comment)
MissDKmissdk on October 2nd, 2010 09:45 am (UTC)
I understand if you're annoyed with the way Damon is getting hurt all the time, but honey, Elena has every right to be mad at him. She saved him from a fire in S1 finale when Bonnie was prepared to let him die, and then he kills her brother! It's not a nice way to say thank you. Of course, a lot happened to him in between, but she didnt know anything about it, about his talk with Katherine etc. She just saw her brother getting killed in front of her eyes so she if she wasnt mad at him, hated him and mean to him I would have hated it, because the DE storyline would not have been believable. If she just forgave him or didnt hate him, it would have made for a cheap story and DE's story isnt like that, it will be amazing :D.

And if Elena continued to just be "the good sweet girl who never hurts anyone" I would have hated it because it becomes boring if she doesnt have layers.

tozubloc on April 9th, 2011 02:29 pm (UTC)
Gosh, I’ve been looking about this specific topic for about an hour, glad i found it in your website!

You are in a maze of twisty little passages: BeardsleyWingedverushka70 on November 18th, 2011 06:13 pm (UTC)
obviously a year+ late
I was just reading this post and I agree with everything you said, everything. I've taken care of many SAs (sexual assaults) in the ER (too many to count, sadly) -- I am an RN -- and nothing about that scene is a sexual assault. He stopped = it's not a sexual assault: end of story.

As we've seen so far in S3, Damon and Stefan have switched places. The episode Ghost World definitely gave Damon his come-uppance and the "punishment" that Damon/Delena haters no doubt wanted to see him get for doing all the things he's done. I think things are about to get VERY interesting from a Delena perspective, after the hiatus, and I can't wait.

One thing I will tell you though: I've been in one fandom or another since 1992, the vast majority online... two of them which suffered major character changes (and cast changes) in their last seasons, which ultimately proved very divisive within the fandoms. I can tell you from personal experience, for those Damon/Delena haters who have already made up their minds, you will likely never change their minds, and it is pointless to try. Many who hated LaCroix, Tracy, and the losses of Janette and Schanke (in Forever Knight fandom) and many who hated RayK (in Due South S3) fandom have never really changed their minds. Some have, but many did not and never will. Don't hope to change their minds... because it's unlikely to happen, and if it does, it will likely be because of something they experienced themselves, an insight based on something they lived through, rather than anything you or I or any other fan says.

When I had human development and PSYCH 101 we learned about how humans develop morality (Kohlberg's stages of moral development). Most people never develop the highest level of moral development; most tend to remain in the conventional stage of moral development (black/white rules followers -- or rule breakers) for the rest of their adult lives. This is why peer pressure, "keeping up with the Joneses," law enforcement, and religion work to keep most people from doing bad things (mostly). Also, the more mature level of moral development (post-conventional morality) is a developmental stage that people don't even enter until adolescence.

Given that many tVD fans are young, I suspect they are still stuck in a more simplistic black/white, good/bad, conventional stage of morality. They have yet to live enough and develop enough to realize that life, and morality, are not black/white or good/bad, but that there are many shades of gray and most people -- including the characters on tVD -- are some combination of shades of gray: no one is all black or all white.

Some may develop a more post-conventional, shades-of-gray mature understanding of morality, later; some may never develop it. I also suspect that Delena/Damon fans are generally at the stage of post-conventional moral development -- and that the Delena/Damon haters are not, they are stuck in an earlier phase of either pre-conventional or conventional morality.

Sadly, for all those in simpler stages of moral development, Damon is and always will be evil because he did a number of bad things in S1 and S2. For them, nothing he ever does that's good will change that. (Probably including S3 - I wonder how they are taking Stefan's switch to the dark side? Not well, I imagine...) So... good luck convincing them. It's just my opinion, but I wouldn't even bother trying for all the reasons I mentioned above. :)

Anyway, a very awesome post. I enjoyed reading it.
MissDKmissdk on November 18th, 2011 06:22 pm (UTC)
Re: obviously a year+ late
Hey there! :D

First, thank you very much for taking the time to read such an ancient post and also taking the time to comment on it.

I've read your comment, and I'm glad to know that someone with first-hand experience on sexual assaults like you also states that this scene was NOT in any kind a sexual assault.

And secondly, everything you wrote after that is very fascinating. I've always had an interest in psychology and in anthropology, so it was really great to read your thoughts about some people and their development in the moral stages. Thanks for a really good read! :)

I've also realized that there is not changing these kids' minds, because like you said, they're all either teens with a white/black mentality or people over the teen-stage but who also never managed to develop further in that respect. So I've stopped trying to convince anyone of anything or to change their minds. It's no use. Now I just write my thoughts to process them and share them with those who are willing to discuss :)